I feel almost as if I’ve grown out of S & M. Even though I’m surrounded by people I love who participate in it. I don’t feel like watching it, thinking about it, participating in it.
I suppose because S & M and D/s have always been so closely linked for me. In my heart I feel like I can’t have one without the other. That the proper guidance of a D relationship is what I need to lead me through the S & M of it all.
I feel bereft at the moment. Lost and so so alone. I feel as if this space isn’t mine any more. Like it hasn’t been for a very long while.
On those terms I think, it’s time I walk away from this little haven. I’ve loved all parts of growing with you these last few years. I hope sincerely that they joy you want fills the valleys you have. I hope you know I’ve loved being here.
All my love.