My heart hurts tonight. Treacherous people circle around my happy times. A near frenzy of sharks feeding. Waiting for the first drop of blood.

Along with my body, medical issues demanded all of my energy for 5 weeks or so. Now I’m filling all of these vouchers bought for my business. (Which please realize I am NOT complaining about it) Truthfully I’m just observing.

Then again I’m probably just sleepy. Also fantasizing about my own place. With a GIANT bed that I can fill with lush pillows. I’m going to get a big good for snuggling dog and my little Pomeranian and we will have sleepy perfect nights.

Yep. That’s what I’m dreaming about tonight. Mostly 🙂

The rest of my thoughts leave me writhing in sweet agony. Imagining being slowly taken. The pain delivered precise and shattering.

What a juxtaposition.


Solo 2

Last night I woke around 11:30 squirming around on the bed my sheets tangled around me. My shorts, well they were soaking wet, the light grey saturated. I slipped my finger in my slit and groaned imagining it was yours. Without turning a light on I rolled over to see if I could find the thing just two weeks ago i dreaded using. The Violator. (It totally deserves its own sentence.) My hand wrapped around it, just under the head. My fingers not quite reaching and in the dark I smiled. My mouth started watering thinking of your dick, the way it fills out the front of your pants, even when you aren’t hard. I wriggled my hips pulling my shorts down and started humming. Something you will learn about me once you are home, when i think I’m alone and touching myself I can’t help but hum.

*Such a lovely place / Such a lovely face*

I slid the head of my dildo between my lips forming a tight O. My tongue working around the head just like I would your cock. I groaned as i pushed it down over my tongue guiding it to the back of my throat. I probably didn’t need to take this step wetting it before sliding it into my pussy. But, I wanted it. The ritual of it. Knowing if you were on the phone with me you would demand it. My fingers continued to flirt with my quickly hardening clit and I removed my saturated hand to make a ring around the rubber cock, six inches up from the two in my mouth.  When I could taste myself I would stop and let it sit there in my throat. I fucked this rubber monster in and out of my mouth as my hips matched the rhythm. I was so hot and needing.

*She’s got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends*

A car turned into the driveway across the street and for a second it illuminated my one person love making session. My shadow was suspended on the wall for a moment and for the first time in my life; I saw what other people did. A sexual being, the figure of a woman. My breasts and how they sat on my chest. The curve of my stomach that ends gently between my hips. My pelvis was lifted so that the fullness of my ass was outlined against the white walls. I have never been able to look at myself in a mirror and think i was attractive. But this shadow woman, this dark person against the wall. Well, she was totally fuck able. 
*We are all just prisoners here / Of our own device / And in the Master’s chambers they gathered for the feast*

The chain of my nipple clamps settled into the curve of my waist, chilling me for a moment, sending goose bumps all over the left side of my body. My nipple as if in response stood and demanded I take attendance. I chuckled around the plastic buried in my throat and flicked my right nipple waking it from slumber. Opening my legs slowly a drop of slick juice rolled out of me. I could feel it slipping around then settling between the cleft of my ass cheeks onto the sheet. I pulled the dildo out of my mouth the head popping past my lips and slipped it inside of me. Now when I bought this thing i never thought it would fit inside of me with girth alone. Granted i can’t get past eleven inches but now it slids into me like a friend. While my humming before this point could have been mistaken for a low snore, the volume was unobstructed so monitoring myself became relevant. With the first thrust, i clamped my left nipple and drew a spot of blood from my lip simultaneously. Sucking as hard as I could the right nipple received the same treatment. With the upmost amount of pain and your previous text in mind, I pulled the chain up sharply and ducked my head under to slip it around my neck.

*But they just can’t kill the beast*

My pussy sucked in the dildo bringing it to only four more inches I had to work in myself. I reached down making a V with my fingers slipped them on either side of my clit. My other hand reaching lower to push this thing inside of me. I pushed slowly savoring the feeling of being entered and pulled back quickly to tease myself. My hips, with a mind of their own, slid down on the mattress as if I would shove it further inside at my own insistence. This caused a multitude of sensations. The chain for my nipple clamps rolled against the sheet pulling my breasts higher. The fingers guarding my clit pinched together and held on tight. The head of the cock left my cunt hole. I whimpered like a slut and shoved the dildo back inside of me, as deep as it would go. My humming reached a new level at this point.

*We are programmed to receive / You can check out at anytime you like / But you can never leave*

My back arched deeply and I realized I’d accepted more of my rubber lover than I ever had.  The thought passed that you would be so pleased and in that second my first orgasm crashed over me. My nipples were throbbing, my clit so sensitive as I moaned like crazy. The new cut on my lips continued to spread the taste of blood into my mouth. While across the street a car left, revealing my shadow again, in that moment of soul shattering ecstasy.

Solo 2


As I walked into my bedroom this evening with your voice ringing in my head. The low notes and rough scratching, I close my eyes imagining you are watching me. Sending the image of me to you while I stand breathing slowly as my hands start to move over my body. First off is my shirt that I know you would hate. It’s a baseball type shirt with the colored sleeves and high neck. The only shirt I own that you can’t see an inch of cleavage. Next are my black yoga pants that I love, because they follow the curve of my ass so nicely. So I’m left in a white undershirt my bra and panties. My hair a tumbled mess falling down my shoulders. My eyes are still closed as the pad of my thumb teases my nipple through my shirt and bra. I run my hands down the curve of my waist wishing you were home, so I could do this for you. Shed my care giving attire and turn into your slut. Lightly my fingers fondle the waistband of my panties, they are new and adorable. This article of clothing I know you would like; to rip off of me, tear them from my body while I squirmed beneath you.  I smile as that familiar pinch reaches my clit, the one that tells me my body is getting ready.

A light catches my eye through the window and I realize the blinds are still open. I shrug; figure this is the same neighbor who used to watch me sunbathing when I was younger. I would glance around and untie the top of my bathing suit; sure tan lines would keep me single. He would watch from his window leaning so close I would swear I could see his eyes burning into me. So what if he sees the sort of woman I’ve grown into, this burning wanton slut for you.

I hook my fingers in my panties and slowly step out of them, paying attention to the way my calf muscles brush against each other. The silky fabric running down my legs, I leave them on the floor with the rest of my clothes. I imagine you now walking in, catching me half-naked and caressing your property. You know the only reason I am deriving any pleasure from this is because I am imagining you. In this fantasy you lean against the door frame watching, smiling your perfectly predatory smile. Your teeth held tight together as i bend over, bare assed to pick up my clothes. You can see between my thighs into my pussy, its deep pink waiting for you to touch, abuse, and use.

At this moment all of your teasing phrases run through my mind. Me being your three hole slut. Your cum dump. Your dirty little pet. A fugitive moan escapes my lips and I am brought out of my fantasy. I’m momentarily embarrassed that the blinds are still open and take the few steps over to close them. Not before first peering through to see the neighbors frame in the window. All I can do is smile and before snapping the blinds shut I realize he’s given me a small wave.